Remember when I deleted my Myspace? Of course you do. I told you all about it. If you remember right, I hesitated to delete because all of the web logs I had written on there. I always intended to save them. Maybe post them somewhere else, but at least have them saved on my computer. What happened?
I got bored at work one day and deleted it. Everything. I saved nothing. I didn't even think about saving stuff when I deleted. When I realized later what I had done I tried to brush it off by saying I can write more stuff. I have written new stuff, but nothing of the quality or caliber of the things I had on Myspace. Everything I ever did on Myspace was great. Now the only thing I have that comes close to my Myspace glory days is the time I turned gay just so I wouldn't have to watch Hairspray. (If that doesn't make sense to you, go back and read it.)
It's now been a while since I deleted my Myspace. I only remember two things that we're on there. I'll give you a brief description of those so you can get an idea of the quality of the things I used to write.
Most Awkward Situation Ever:
This was just a strange buy true story. It started on a weekend. I met these two girls. Mindy and I forget who the other one was. I don't think I every actually knew her name.
The next week was the Fourth of July. Brigham City always has fireworks on or around the fourth. I was going to go and watch the fireworks the two aforementioned girls.
This is where my memory gets hazy. All I remember is that I was supposed to bring a friend. I went to get that friend. Three other dudes got in the car with him. We were five dudes in a car going to meet two girls.
When we got to Brigham, I somehow was able to find the girls. It was more luck than anything. The directions as to their whereabouts were terrible. They didn't even know which way was north. There was some other dude with them when I found them. I don't know what happened to my four friends. I think they got sick of looking for two idiots and just sat down somewhere.
The fireworks suck. The best part was when some little kid spit on me.
I don't know why, but for some reason we went over to Mindy's house after. I think it was because she had ketchup at her house.
So we get to this girls house, five dudes, two girls and one random dude that no one knew. We were there for about 30 seconds when one of the girls said she had to go home. That made it five dudes, 1 girl and one random dude no one knew.
The night ended with two of my friends sitting at the kitchen counter eating their Wendy's. The rest were playing Uno in the living room. Three dudes, one girl and one random dude playing Uno. Not just any Uno thought, Uno Attack!.
The random dude kept saying the same thing over and over because one of my friends had said it earlier and it was kind of funny.
I wish I had the real story of that. I've forgotten so much. That was a fun time. Even though it was 2 or 3 years ago, I still haver her number for some reason. I'm going to call her.
Bruce Morris:
This turned into a little four or five part miniseries. It started out by me just mentioning some cool things that happened on the day I was born. Turns out not much happened that day.
The coolest thing I could find was '"The Shot Herd 'Round the World".
It was a shot that Bruce Morris made on February 7, 1985 while playing for Marshall University. The shot was like 89 feet 6 inches or something like that. A pair of footprints now adorn the court from the spot the shot was taken. I remember the footprints because I made a joke about how Marshall players shoot from those footprints everyday in practice. Only they shoot at the other basket, turning the shot into an impressive four foot shot. It was much funnier when I told it before.
I thought that was that. One of my readers must have looked into the shot. They found discrepancies in both the date and length of the shot.
This is when I started researching the shot. To this day, I've never done more research on anything than Bruce Morris' shot "herd" round the world.
Turns out there were discrepancies on both the date and length of shot. I was able to find three different dates and three different lengths. The dates were the 6th, 7th and 8th of February. The lengths ranged everywhere from 86 feet to 92 feet.
In the end I was able to confirm that the shot indeed did happen of February 7, 1985 from a distance of 89 feet 6 inches (or something like that.) My birthday thing was saved.
I wish I still had that stuff.
Friday, April 4, 2008
Thursday, April 3, 2008
What Is This 'S'?
People keep trying to sell their 'S'. I'm here to tell you what that 'S' is.
I wish people would stop trying to trade stuff. You aren't ten anymore. These aren't baseball cards. Just take your motorcycle to the bike shop and put your stereo system up for sale, not trade.
Trampoline up for trade. My biggest problem with this isn't the fact that they are trying to trade a trampoline for kids clothes. Although that is stupid. My problem is that they listed this item under about 7 categories. They say they don't know which category it would fall under. Really, you don't know what category to put a trampoline in?
Who would want this? Oh yeah. The same guy with a primer colored Civic with $3,000 rims.
Awesome. Just awesome.
Here is your business idea Justin. I don't know exactly what it is. The description says:
WITH A SMALL INVESTMENT YOUCAN MAKE A
LOT OF MONEY BY BECOMING THE EXCLUSIVE
DISTROBUTER OF THIS GREAT UNIQUE PRODUCT
ALL OVER USA
It doesn't actually say what it is, but from the picture, it looks like paper towels. Apparently those are great and unique these days.
No one wants these. You couldn't pay me $5 to wear these headphones. Who is going to buy three of these anyways?
For all of you that thought war was the answer. You are getting one of these in your front lawn.
What kind of people have 200-300 boxes just laying around that they are willing to give away for free?
Sweet! I can finally get one of these for my tank. For free too. This is the best day ever. Now if I just knew what a plecostomus was.
I want to meet this guy. I want to find out what makes him not just a bachelor, but a dedicated bachelor.
This would be cool to have. Can't they just call it what it is though? It's a fridge. Anyone who buys it is probably going to put more than just beverages in it.
You didn't know that you didn't have room for this when you bought it. Just tell the real reason you are selling it. You've had for 2 years and you've only used it twice.
I assume this is the same "elyptical" They said pictures would be coming soon and here is a picture. Maybe they don't have room. It appears to be right next to the kitchen table.
Police challenge coins. I don't know what these are, but I kind of wish I had some.
Ring one. Ring two. We have a problem people. I could have put up many more wedding rings that are for sale. I also approve about one card a week to put on the bulletin board in the TSC that is trying to sell a wedding ring. Either people are selling their wedding rings, which is their prerogative. Or guys keep asking girls to marry them when the girl doesn't want too. I'm going with the later. Knock it off guys.
I've been doing some looking into diamonds recently. The chick on Adam Carolla's show was talking about how she refused to get a mined diamond on her wedding ring. She would only get a man-made one. I decided to see what the difference was.
Turns out their is almost no difference. Except the man-made diamonds don't have the little imperfections in them that you find in mined diamonds. Mined diamonds are a little harder, but the man-made ones are pretty freaking hard. Mined diamonds are a 10 on the hardness scale. Man-made are only a 9.1. The only real major difference between the two is that mined diamonds cost thousands of dollars per carat. Man-made diamonds are only a couple of hundred dollars per carat. Then there is also the slave labor you are supporting when you buy a mined diamond. Then the thousands of people that die mining diamonds. No one has died making a man-made diamond.
Diamonds AREN'T rare people. One company just controls the market and they can do whatever they want to the price. Experts can't tell the difference between mined diamonds and man-made diamonds unless they have fancy sophisticated equipment. Stop buying mined diamonds.
So the next time you think of asking a girl to marry you, buy a man-made diamond. With the money you save you can buy an engagement hot tub or something. Then if she says no at least you'll have a hot tub.
Sorry for the tangent. Back to the 'S'.
For the guy that bought that gold bike. Now you can pimp out your golf cart.
Is this guy writing a book? Or does he just have a strange fetish for hearing weird stories?
Lazy person number 1 and lazy person number 2. There people are stupid. I found both of these items for sale or free. Just look first before you say you want something.
Tear stains? On puppies? This is a problem?
This guy really like appliances. He doesn't care what they are, just that it is an appliance. If it's an appliance, he wants it.
That's all the 'S' I have for now.
As long as people keep selling their 'S', I'll be here to let you know what it is.
I wish people would stop trying to trade stuff. You aren't ten anymore. These aren't baseball cards. Just take your motorcycle to the bike shop and put your stereo system up for sale, not trade.
Trampoline up for trade. My biggest problem with this isn't the fact that they are trying to trade a trampoline for kids clothes. Although that is stupid. My problem is that they listed this item under about 7 categories. They say they don't know which category it would fall under. Really, you don't know what category to put a trampoline in?
Who would want this? Oh yeah. The same guy with a primer colored Civic with $3,000 rims.
Awesome. Just awesome.
Here is your business idea Justin. I don't know exactly what it is. The description says:
WITH A SMALL INVESTMENT YOUCAN MAKE A
LOT OF MONEY BY BECOMING THE EXCLUSIVE
DISTROBUTER OF THIS GREAT UNIQUE PRODUCT
ALL OVER USA
It doesn't actually say what it is, but from the picture, it looks like paper towels. Apparently those are great and unique these days.
No one wants these. You couldn't pay me $5 to wear these headphones. Who is going to buy three of these anyways?
For all of you that thought war was the answer. You are getting one of these in your front lawn.
What kind of people have 200-300 boxes just laying around that they are willing to give away for free?
Sweet! I can finally get one of these for my tank. For free too. This is the best day ever. Now if I just knew what a plecostomus was.
I want to meet this guy. I want to find out what makes him not just a bachelor, but a dedicated bachelor.
This would be cool to have. Can't they just call it what it is though? It's a fridge. Anyone who buys it is probably going to put more than just beverages in it.
You didn't know that you didn't have room for this when you bought it. Just tell the real reason you are selling it. You've had for 2 years and you've only used it twice.
I assume this is the same "elyptical" They said pictures would be coming soon and here is a picture. Maybe they don't have room. It appears to be right next to the kitchen table.
Police challenge coins. I don't know what these are, but I kind of wish I had some.
Ring one. Ring two. We have a problem people. I could have put up many more wedding rings that are for sale. I also approve about one card a week to put on the bulletin board in the TSC that is trying to sell a wedding ring. Either people are selling their wedding rings, which is their prerogative. Or guys keep asking girls to marry them when the girl doesn't want too. I'm going with the later. Knock it off guys.
I've been doing some looking into diamonds recently. The chick on Adam Carolla's show was talking about how she refused to get a mined diamond on her wedding ring. She would only get a man-made one. I decided to see what the difference was.
Turns out their is almost no difference. Except the man-made diamonds don't have the little imperfections in them that you find in mined diamonds. Mined diamonds are a little harder, but the man-made ones are pretty freaking hard. Mined diamonds are a 10 on the hardness scale. Man-made are only a 9.1. The only real major difference between the two is that mined diamonds cost thousands of dollars per carat. Man-made diamonds are only a couple of hundred dollars per carat. Then there is also the slave labor you are supporting when you buy a mined diamond. Then the thousands of people that die mining diamonds. No one has died making a man-made diamond.
Diamonds AREN'T rare people. One company just controls the market and they can do whatever they want to the price. Experts can't tell the difference between mined diamonds and man-made diamonds unless they have fancy sophisticated equipment. Stop buying mined diamonds.
So the next time you think of asking a girl to marry you, buy a man-made diamond. With the money you save you can buy an engagement hot tub or something. Then if she says no at least you'll have a hot tub.
Sorry for the tangent. Back to the 'S'.
For the guy that bought that gold bike. Now you can pimp out your golf cart.
Is this guy writing a book? Or does he just have a strange fetish for hearing weird stories?
Lazy person number 1 and lazy person number 2. There people are stupid. I found both of these items for sale or free. Just look first before you say you want something.
Tear stains? On puppies? This is a problem?
This guy really like appliances. He doesn't care what they are, just that it is an appliance. If it's an appliance, he wants it.
That's all the 'S' I have for now.
As long as people keep selling their 'S', I'll be here to let you know what it is.
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